What 20 Really Means

When we turn 20 we enter a race. 

Some of us seek adventure.

Others enjoy reliving high-school, in the most unflattering way possible.

Some build a safe house out of friends, while others leave home. To become someone different.

Some run as fast as they can in whatever direction seems the more shiny.

Some of us invest in storage facilities otherwise known as a ‘houses’, to store the one we love to love. And somewhere in between, throw a ring at it and call it ‘mature’.

Some run directly away it all, in the hopes of escaping pressed time.

 

People often tell me how lucky I am to be this age, but I think they are forgetting what 20 really means.

At twenty, you’re first introduced to your loneliest self ( if you haven’t already met ).

You grapple with everything you never had to think twice about. Cooking, weekly- washes, grocery shops and budgeting; all daily reminders that you’re an amateur and need older people in order to function.

You learn how to treat people like shit and not think twice about it. And then understand for yourself what it feels like on the other end.

You fall in and out of lust and fads while the seasons change, along with your likes, wants and needs.

 

In saying all of this, I do love watching all of the other Bambi 2.0’s that litter my university. I have no idea what these people are racing towards, yet at some point they all look as nervous as me.

I might never know if they’re losing or winning; what hand life will play them.

How many will change their path during a mid-life crisis’ and which will succeed in finding a career they are passionate about.

Or, how many divorces and pills will be popped. How many will be able to afford to wear wrinkles.

I have no idea about any of them.

What I do know is that being 20 is not at all what I expected.

I wake up with it. I dream about it. I see it on Instagram, in my passions and in my degree.

My race consists of ambition and then exhaustion. At times, the back and forth does scare me. But I like to think it inspires and pushes people more than an anything else.

In saying this, I propose we update the definition, as dictionary.com is as helpful as a single shoe.

Twenty  [twen-tee, twuhn-]  ( noun ) 

The number in which you begin from scratch and try your hardest to become someone you wouldn’t mind sleeping with.